How to stop a bully by changing your shirt

'Pink is gay!', the bullies taunted him, referring to his choice of shirt color. Taunts, harassment, and threats followed this still-unnamed high-school freshman during his first day of school in the small Canadian town of Cambridge, Nova Scotia. Fortunately, seniors David Shepherd and Travis Price caught wind of the bullying and decided they had had enough of the bullying they'd seen in their school. They resolved to act. David told The Chronicle Herald in Nova Scotia, "I've stood around too long and I wanted to do something." So, together with some friends, they developed a plan: we all wear pink, stand together, and those bullies can't make fun of all of us.

I don't know whether David and Travis are Catholics, and I doubt that they've yet done an intensive study of Catholic Social Teaching, but their actions certainly embody the spirit of solidarity and of creative nonviolent conflict transformation. Don't worry, I'll try to explain.

CTU's own Sr. Barbara Reid, O.P. spoke to the Peacebuilders Initiative participants during our Summer Program, where she discussed the "third way" of responding to conflict, introduced by Jesus (remember, participants?). David and Travis could have responded by lashing back at the bullies, fighting fire with fire. That's the "first way": eye for eye, tooth for tooth. They also could have pretended not to notice what was going on, leaving the victim feeling alone and desperate. That's the "second way": effectively turning your back on the problems or conflict in front of you by doing nothing. The third way is more loving than the violence of the first, more courageous than the pacifism of the second, and more effective in solving the problem than either.

These two high-schoolers transformed the conflict by forcing the bullies to make a choice: if they were going to bully, they were going to have to bully all of them.David, Travis, and the roughly 400 other students at Central Kings Rural High whom they encouraged to wear pink shirts the next day. The strength in number of those standing in solidarity with the bullied student shamed the bullies so that they could only take out their frustrations by throwing cafeteria chairs, The Chronicle Herald reported.

What can we as Peacebuilders learn from their example? To paraphrase Dan Leger, who wrote an opinion piece about this story in The Chronicle Herald, we learn that all the administrative "zero tolerance" bullying policies in the world cannot compete with the initiative of a handful (perhaps less) of inspired, creative, and committed students. They didn't play the victim, telling themselves that there was nothing to do, and just wait and wish for a solution; they did take control of the situation, told themselves 'we can do something together', and took responsibility for making their school an abuse- and bully-free place.

As a result, David, Travis, and the other brave students with them helped bring some peace to a boy who, upon seeing the sea of pink at school, looked "like a big weight had been lifted off his shoulder." Who would have thought that changing someone's life could be as simple as changing your shirt?

Catholic Connections

"Solidarity... is not a feeling of vague compassion or shallow distress at the misfortunes of so many people, both near and far. On the contrary, it is a firm and persevering determination to commit oneself to the common good; that is to say, to the good of all and each individual, because we are all really responsible for all..."

-- Pope John Paul II , From On Social Concern, #38

Reflection Questions

How do you respond when you see others bullied or are bullied yourself?

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